First, the good news. yesterday (Saturday) I went 3 for 5 with 2 RBIs in my game against Warner Robbins. I have been seeing the ball exceptionally well and I knew it was only a matter of time and sure enough I broke out getting 3 hits in my last 3 at-bats. It's a good day when you double your season hit total and it felt good...extremely good. And then the floor fell out from under my feet.
It was no secret that the league was struggling. All you needed to do was look at the attendance numbers to know that the league wasn't exactly raking in cash, but I don't think any of us knew how bad it really was. After the game, Eddie (our manager) sat us down in the clubhouse and he basically told us that the league was going to be making some changes. Instead of having 4 teams the league was going to condense to 2 teams; the Macon Pinetoppers and then another team that will play the role of the other 3 teams depending on who Macon is supposed to play. First, this means that some players will be going home. They're expanding to a 30 man roster, but there would still be far too many players for just 2 teams. Second, this means that the Albany Quails as we know it will cease to exist. I have grown to like this ragtag group of guys that make up my team. While it is true that they often drive me completely insane we've grown into a family and our family is being forced to break up and it hurts a little bit. I've never been one to have a lot of friends and I haven't done a very good job of maintaining the friendships I did have, but I felt like some real friendships were growing and it is extremely disappointing to face the prospect of losing people that now call friends. More than that, however, I'm scared that I'm going to have to go home.
If I didn't love baseball life would be so much easier. My body would have far fewer scars and I would probably have a degree from an Ivy League school. I have chased a dream and it has hurt me time and time again and I just feel like when they post the new rosters in 5 hours or so that I'm just going to be burned one more time again. I just want to play baseball. I just want the opportunity to play and see if I sink or swim. I don't feel like I've gotten that opportunity yet, especially not here where I only have 27 at-bats in 17 games. In my entire lifetime I have now caught 10 and a half games. The number of games I've caught in the Peach League: 10. I know in my heart and in my mind that I can succeed in this game I just need to be given the chance. On top of that, I've been shown what kind of absolutely amazing ministry opportunities come with being a baseball player and they only get bigger and better from here. That excites me more than anything else. I know I'm not the only one, but I just want my shot. Honestly, is that too much to ask?
I find out in the morning. I've done well recently, but I just hope that it wasn't too little too late. All I know is that God has an amazing plan for me and that if I wake up and don't find my name on that list then there's something in store for me, again, that is beyond my wildest dreams.
On a side note, if the ride is over at least I went out going 3 for 3.
No comments:
Post a Comment